So I decided that maybe people want to get to know me a bit better, understand anxiety and depression a bit better, or just have burning questions. I have a list of some brief questions first, and then later we’ll get to the deep stuff. If you have any questions, please leave them in the comment section below and I will answer them!
Lets get started with some basics.
Where are you from?
If you haven’t read my letter to Miami, that answers the question. But I am born and raised in Miami, Florida, specifically in Coconut Grove. Now I go to school at Lewis & Clark College in Portland, Oregon.
What are you majoring in?
Art History and Music with a vocal performance concentration.
Did you always want to do that?
Heeeeeeellllll no. Up until my junior year of high school I 150% wanted to be an actress. My heart was sold on it. I was willing to do anything to be on Broadway. I had been in the theatre community since I was in elementary school and I had been in every play in middle and high school. And then I took an art history class and my whole life changed. I always knew I wanted to keep music in my life because I’ve been doing it since I was 5 years old. I’m still open to change in my life. Who knows? Maybe I’ll go to med school when I graduate. (Doubtful but who knows)
Really? Um… uh… nope. No honestly I don’t think I have one. I do have a favorite painting though: The Arnolfini Portrait by Jan van Eyck (incase you didn’t see my post about that one)
How about music.
When I say I like something from every genre, I am 100% serious. I really do. But my favorite band is the Decemberists, but I’m a metal head, a jazz freak, an opera enthusiast, growing EDM liker, country dancer, anything.
Have you ever been in love?
Yep. Before my boyfriend (who I am currently in love with) I was in a relationship with a great guy for 6 years and I was definitely in love with him.
Puppies or kittens?
Are you fucking kidding me? Thats like asking me to pick a favorite child. They’re both amazingly adorable.
Did you always know you had disorders?
Well this took a turn from puppies and kittens. Nope. I had a hunch when I was in 8th grade that I was depressed because it was the first time I wanted to kill myself, but my mom convinced me that I wasn’t. I couldn’t even imagine having anxiety. I just always thought I was ridiculously hard on myself. Like REALLY hard on myself. I’ve been terrified of heights since I was 8 years old and I’ve always been a bit of a hypochondriac.
When were you diagnosed?
I was diagnosed with a panic anxiety disorder when I was 18, a month before I went to college. I started having panic attacks in April of my senior year of high school. I was never officially diagnosed with depression until college.
I was going to prom with a friend of mine. Sure I missed my boyfriend at the time, but I was determined to still have fun even without him there. However, while I was in line for photos, I suddenly couldn’t breathe. My heart was racing and I didn’t know why. I had to be escorted home because they were worried. So I came home from prom early with my shoes over my shoulder and tears in my eyes. Although it was my favorite prom look, it was definitely my least favorite prom. Then, I had 2 panic attacks later that week, one that ended up with me in a hospital. I broke up with my boyfriend that May because I was worried about my mental health, but then I continued to have them nearly weekly the entire semester.
And how about the depression?
Thats for another post friend. In short, lets just say it had to do with some really really REALLY mean girls and nearly a divorce. Also I was depressed all of my senior year of high school.
Where did okayzoeyk come from?
I’m not sure. I think that I’m “just okay” so I’m okay zoey k. The underneath title came from a snapchat my friend made of me of that photo.
Why did you decide to make a blog talking about your weird ass life?
Well, I think a lot of other people are like me and maybe feel really alone. I want to reach out to those people and show them that there are people who are as strange and weird and suffer from similar mental disorders and are still trying to get through life. Plus, there are so many misconceptions about mental health. I think if I start being more real about it, people will take it more seriously and get educated. Plus I think my life is kind of funny and nice despite it.
Thats all I got for tonight. Have a great day filled with kittens, Okay?
P.S. Question: Why do you always sign out like that?
Everyones day should always be filled with cute animals. Its an automatic happy thing. Why not have a day filled with kittens?